Quotes!

**Shady** · 05-29-2006, 10:22 PM

I wanted to share some funny quotes i found
and if anyone has quotes post them here

# In a world without walls and fences who needs Windows and Gates?
# Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children.
# Drugs cause amnesia and other things I can't remember
# Early to rise, and early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead.
# F u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgrmmng.
# For a good time, call (415) 642-9483.
# Give a jackass an education and you get a smartass.
# Goals are deceptive. The unaimed arrow never misses.
# How come wrong numbers are never busy?
# How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.
# I have a strong will but a weak won't.
# I still miss my ex. But my aim is getting better.
# I thought I was wrong once, but it turns out I was mistaken.
# I went to a fight and a hockey game broke out.
# If the opposite of pro is con, then what must be the opposite of progress?
# If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
# If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly.
# If you understand what you're doing, you're not learning anything.
# Laugh at your problems; everybody else does.
# Linux: because rebooting is for adding new hardware.
# Married men live longer than single men, but they're a lot more willing to die.
# Maybe this world is another planet's hell.
# Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
# Never, ever make absolute, unconditional statements.
# Some people wish to get what they deserve, while others fear the same.
# Teamwork is essential - it allows you to blame someone else.
# There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics.
# To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
# War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
# We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

mat2317 · 05-29-2006, 10:25 PM

"Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children." - rofl

bigsaucybob · 05-29-2006, 10:32 PM

Quote:

If the opposite of pro is con, then what must be the opposite of progress

Haha, thats good.

**Shady** · 05-30-2006, 12:23 AM

also comments would be useful you don't have to post quotes only

**Cromewell** · 05-30-2006, 12:56 AM

I like the despair posters (http://www.despair.com/) they are funny.

DarkJokerX · 05-30-2006, 01:02 AM

"We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police."

Sad but true

palmmann · 05-30-2006, 07:41 AM

<Nookadum> I need to learn html can anyone help?
<Blar> Sure. Just put this on your webpage and when you go there a cool editor for it will come up - N o o k a d u m S u c k s C @ # *.(censore d)
<Nookadum> Thanks.
* Nookadum has quit IRC (Quit: Off to work on my webpage. ^-^)

Some time later.

* Nookadum has joined #Megatokyo
<Nookadum> Hey! **** you!
<Blar> Alright. I forgot to tell you, you have to press F4 for it to work. That message is just protecting the secret of the editor.
<Nookadum> Oh.. Alright.
* Nookadum has quit IRC (Connection reset by client)

<Tobrae> Y'know, I can't stand all these "lol i got this one dude to erase hsi hard drive" submissions on bash.org
<Tobrae> Do a search for "deltree" on Bash. Look at those scores. Those are OUTLANDISH
<Brulam> A little bitter, are we Tob?

<Tobrae> No, I just don't find that very funny. I don't find any of the "lol look at tihs tard lolol" quotes funny.
<ajax> wut does deltree /y c:*.* do??
<Tobrae> ...Can't you read?
<Brulam> enter it in dos
<Tobrae> Oh, no, we're not stooping down to their level
* ajax has quit IRC (Quit: )
<Tobrae> Don't, ajax, it'll e...
<Tobrae> ...
<Brulam> lol what a tard we got him to earse hsi hard drive!!11 rofl
<Tobrae> HAHA OMG SUBMITTED!!!!!

* billh doing a survey of points in the Linux kernel where mutex replacement would increase preemption and therefore reduce latency for hard RT useage.
<sateh> bill
<sateh> there are too many words in that sentence
<sateh> zzzzzzzzzzz
<sateh> http://www.wegenermedia.com/
<sateh> ibok spare parts!
<sateh> wheee!
<Feanor> hmm
<Feanor> sateh's drunk

<Tetsuo> I've given up doubting the search phrases you say people find your site by. You can't possibly make stuff that stupid up.
<CommanderStab> Oh yeh?! Check this joke out for size!
<Tetsuo> Oh Lord, what have I done now? ^_-
<CommanderStab> "What's the difference between a tax cheat and a corpse?"
<CommanderStab> "One's a Fed Ducker, and the other's a..."
<CommanderStab> ...Shit, I forgot how it ends.....
<Tetsuo> I take it all back.

<Gin> Cocaine is white
<Gin> Marijuana is green
<Gin> So won't you please be
<Gin> My drug lord queen
<Gin> HAPPY VALENTINES DAY

this one cracked me up
<Xenecrite> wanna hear a joke?
<Xenecrite> Women's Rights
<Lone_wolf_gurl> you have 5 seconds to start running.

all from bash.org. sorry for the long post, but this stuff is HILARIOUS!

34erd · 05-30-2006, 07:46 AM

Give a man a fire, he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

**dragon2309** · 05-30-2006, 12:40 PM

Quote:

I went to a fight and a hockey game broke out.

lol, thats brilliant

dragon

Motoxrdude · 05-30-2006, 03:00 PM

"When a mime gets arrested, does it have to right to remain motionless?"

05-29-2006, 10:22 PM	#1 (permalink)
Shady Moderator Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Cairo Age: 20 Posts: 2,336	Quotes! I wanted to share some funny quotes i found and if anyone has quotes post them here # In a world without walls and fences who needs Windows and Gates? # Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children. # Drugs cause amnesia and other things I can't remember # Early to rise, and early to bed, makes a man healthy but socially dead. # F u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgrmmng. # For a good time, call (415) 642-9483. # Give a jackass an education and you get a smartass. # Goals are deceptive. The unaimed arrow never misses. # How come wrong numbers are never busy? # How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on. # I have a strong will but a weak won't. # I still miss my ex. But my aim is getting better. # I thought I was wrong once, but it turns out I was mistaken. # I went to a fight and a hockey game broke out. # If the opposite of pro is con, then what must be the opposite of progress? # If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. # If you can't learn to do it well, learn to enjoy doing it badly. # If you understand what you're doing, you're not learning anything. # Laugh at your problems; everybody else does. # Linux: because rebooting is for adding new hardware. # Married men live longer than single men, but they're a lot more willing to die. # Maybe this world is another planet's hell. # Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. # Never, ever make absolute, unconditional statements. # Some people wish to get what they deserve, while others fear the same. # Teamwork is essential - it allows you to blame someone else. # There are three kinds of lies: Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics. # To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. # War does not determine who is right - only who is left. # We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

05-29-2006, 10:25 PM	#2 (permalink)
mat2317 Platinum Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: UK,Essex Age: 19 Posts: 529	"Children in the dark make accidents, but accidents in the dark make children." - rofl __________________ CPU: P4 LGA775 3.4ghz @ 3.5ghz HSF: Zalman CNPS9500 RAM: 2GB corsoir xms DDR2 666mhz -PC5400- HDD: 250GB WD HDD Sata II 16MB cache GPU: BFG 8800GT OC Mobo: MSI P4N Diamond Case: Antec 900 Sound Card: X-FI Xtreme Music

05-30-2006, 12:56 AM	#5 (permalink)
Cromewell Moderator Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Canada Age: 24 Posts: 10,010	I like the despair posters (http://www.despair.com/) they are funny. __________________ You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with 'til ya understand who's in ruttin' command here. I must plug a couple comics because they are good :D: www.ctrlaltdel-online.com www.userfriendly.org

05-30-2006, 01:02 AM	#6 (permalink)
DarkJokerX Gold Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Centreville, MD Age: 20 Posts: 298	"We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police." Sad but true __________________ Processor: Intel(R) Core(TM)2 Duo CPU E6850 @ 3.00GHz Memory: 2046MB RAM Hard Drive: 320 GB Video Card: NVIDIA GeForce 7300 GT Operating System: Windows Vista™ Ultimate

05-30-2006, 07:41 AM	#7 (permalink)
palmmann banned Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 979	<Nookadum> I need to learn html can anyone help? <Blar> Sure. Just put this on your webpage and when you go there a cool editor for it will come up - N<br>o<BR>o<BR>k<BR>a<BR>d<BR>u<BR>m<BR><BR>S<BR>u <BR>c<BR>k<BR>s<BR><BR>C<BR>@<BR>#<BR>.(censore d) <Nookadum> Thanks. Nookadum has quit IRC (Quit: Off to work on my webpage. ^-^) Some time later. * Nookadum has joined #Megatokyo <Nookadum> Hey! **** you! <Blar> Alright. I forgot to tell you, you have to press F4 for it to work. That message is just protecting the secret of the editor. <Nookadum> Oh.. Alright. * Nookadum has quit IRC (Connection reset by client) <Tobrae> Y'know, I can't stand all these "lol i got this one dude to erase hsi hard drive" submissions on bash.org <Tobrae> Do a search for "deltree" on Bash. Look at those scores. Those are OUTLANDISH <Brulam> A little bitter, are we Tob? <Tobrae> No, I just don't find that very funny. I don't find any of the "lol look at tihs tard lolol" quotes funny. <ajax> wut does deltree /y c:. do?? <Tobrae> ...Can't you read? <Brulam> enter it in dos <Tobrae> Oh, no, we're not stooping down to their level * ajax has quit IRC (Quit: ) <Tobrae> Don't, ajax, it'll e... <Tobrae> ... <Brulam> lol what a tard we got him to earse hsi hard drive!!11 rofl <Tobrae> HAHA OMG SUBMITTED!!!!! * billh doing a survey of points in the Linux kernel where mutex replacement would increase preemption and therefore reduce latency for hard RT useage. <sateh> bill <sateh> there are too many words in that sentence <sateh> zzzzzzzzzzz <sateh> http://www.wegenermedia.com/ <sateh> ibok spare parts! <sateh> wheee! <Feanor> hmm <Feanor> sateh's drunk <Tetsuo> I've given up doubting the search phrases you say people find your site by. You can't possibly make stuff that stupid up. <CommanderStab> Oh yeh?! Check this joke out for size! <Tetsuo> Oh Lord, what have I done now? ^_- <CommanderStab> "What's the difference between a tax cheat and a corpse?" <CommanderStab> "One's a Fed Ducker, and the other's a..." <CommanderStab> ...Shit, I forgot how it ends..... <Tetsuo> I take it all back. <Gin> Cocaine is white <Gin> Marijuana is green <Gin> So won't you please be <Gin> My drug lord queen <Gin> HAPPY VALENTINES DAY this one cracked me up <Xenecrite> wanna hear a joke? <Xenecrite> Women's Rights <Lone_wolf_gurl> you have 5 seconds to start running. all from bash.org. sorry for the long post, but this stuff is HILARIOUS!

05-30-2006, 12:23 AM	#4 (permalink)
Shady Moderator Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Cairo Age: 20 Posts: 2,336	also comments would be useful you don't have to post quotes only

05-30-2006, 07:46 AM	#8 (permalink)
34erd Diamond Member Join Date: Jul 2005 Age: 15 Posts: 2,842	Give a man a fire, he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire, he'll be warm for the rest of his life. __________________ DFI Lanparty UT nF4 SLI DR Athlon 64 3500+ Venice 1 Gig OCZ VX DDR500 DDR BFG GeForce 7800GT 160 Gig SATA HDD CD-RW DVD-ROM Antec NeoPower 480 Thermaltake Tsunami

05-30-2006, 03:00 PM	#10 (permalink)
Motoxrdude Diamond Member Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Nor Cal Age: 17 Posts: 5,850	"When a mime gets arrested, does it have to right to remain motionless?" __________________ RIP Mom 9/17/55-02/22/08.

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