teens Internet activity -

[rick99]

I'm planning to get some software for my home PC to allow me to better watch what my kids are getting into online. I just learned yesterday of a home PC version of what my office uses, and downloaded a trial version to test out. At first look, it looks pretty good.

It logs all of the PC activity and then offers different reports / fiunctions that let you look back at the activity. So far I've just played with the summary of websites visited, amount of time on them, as i expect that to be my primary use.

My next delemma is whether I will let my kids know I have this program, and I see pros and cons for either choice. I'm curious what others think of that question, especially those who use this type of software (Family Cyber Alert is what I use; I'm sure there are others)

Any thoughts, suggestions from experience? Thx.

 

[tremmor]

i think one is internet nanny. i was also concerned about the grand kids. i need to investigate further also. these kids have to much savvy. though they play at disney and such they do know how to google and find what they want. keep us up to date on what you find. im interested.http://www.netnanny.com/
at least i think this is what many have mentioned.

 

[bmtt]

Don't tell them your installing it. Personally, I feel if kids think software installed on computers are there to spy on them and to watch what they do, they'll either find a way of uninstalling/disabling the software, or they'll carry on regardless. Check the reports often and if you find your not happy with the websites they are visiting, talk to them about it then.

 

[rick99]

Yeah - You are right - it always amazes me how comfortable they are just navigating their way around the PC, websites, programs, etc,., without any real instruction. I think I heard of the nanny software, but kind of remember it being more of a filter, which is fine, just not the way I want to approach this right now. You could compare with Family Cyber Alert - I have the website that I got it from somewhere here. Well, maybe another time (or google it) - have to run.

 

[Hsv_Man]

I disagree with the whole spying on kids thing. Let kids be kids. If they want to know about something they will find it out whether they find it out on the internet or someone tells them at school. The world has gone soft in my opinion the first sign of something a bit different and the do gooders get straight on the band wagon "buy this software to stop your kids accessing inappropriate sites" while these companies are making millions.

 

[1337dingo]

i think one is internet nanny. i was also concerned about the grand kids. i need to investigate further also. these kids have to much savvy. though they play at disney and such they do know how to google and find what they want. keep us up to date on what you find. im interested.http://www.netnanny.com/
at least i think this is what many have mentioned.

agreed netnanny is a good one my dad used it on me and my brother

 

[kobaj]

I disagree with the whole spying on kids thing. Let kids be kids. If they want to know about something they will find it out whether they find it out on the internet or someone tells them at school. The world has gone soft in my opinion the first sign of something a bit different and the do gooders get straight on the band wagon "buy this software to stop your kids accessing inappropriate sites" while these companies are making millions.

True enough, don't let you kid have the internet till he's 13 for one. Or as long as the software is blocking ridiculous sites, like tubgirl.

Buy him a porno mag, he'll be fine.

 

[bmtt]

You'll never be able to block out 100% of the sites you don't want your kids visiting. My friends 15 year old son went out, and bought one of those PAYG Mobile Broadband sticks, topped it up and had all the sites he wanted, unknown to his parents. As I've said, they'll find a way.

 

[rick99]

I appreciate all of the good feedback - and have decided in our case I will likely let our kids know we have this software and will plan to use it simply to keep a general eye on where they are spending their online time, for how long, etc. No plans to snoop on their private e-mails etc, though I do prefer to know who they are in touch with online - not real comfortable with getting chummy with a stranger who can too easily pretend to be someone very different than who they really are.

I simply plan to use this as a means to keep me a bit more familiar with what they are getting into, as they are not always so quick to tell me all, so that when I do talk with them about using the Internet safely and responsibly, I might have more of a clue about what I talk about!

While I'm not using it this way, I don't necessarily have a strong argument with parents who use it without telling their kids. Im thinking itt depends on parent child relationship, circumstances...and in the end, parents #1 job is keeping children safe - sometimes more extreme approaches are warranted.

I did finally find the website, if anyone wants to compare Family Cyber Alert with the internet nanny, which I think is more of a website blocking filter, which I was not looking for. http://www.itcompany.com/fca.htm

 

[bmtt]

Good luck with it all!

 

[Ryan_Fpv]

If your kids are young, say, under 13, then it's fine to spy on them. BUT, you should also spend time educating your kids on the dangers of the internet and if you wouldn't mind, also teaching them about internet etiquettes, such as "dnt tlk lyk a no0b". There's a whole generation of kids coming through who take the internet for granted and simply have no respect.

If they're over 13, and/or the computers are their own computers, then just let them do what they want. Does it really hurt them if they see boobies on the internet? If you're worried about them getting a virus or something from a dodgy porn website, teach them how to find the good ones.

 

[Dystopia]

If your kids are young, say, under 13, then it's fine to spy on them. BUT, you should also spend time educating your kids on the dangers of the internet and if you wouldn't mind, also teaching them about internet etiquettes, such as "dnt tlk lyk a no0b". There's a whole generation of kids coming through who take the internet for granted and simply have no respect.

If they're over 13, and/or the computers are their own computers, then just let them do what they want. Does it really hurt them if they see boobies on the internet? If you're worried about them getting a virus or something from a dodgy porn website, teach them how to find the good ones.

Until they get into hardcore porn? Thats how it starts, just boobies...not sayin everyone, but its still where it starts.

Parental Control works like a charm. You either see just what sites they visit or even have screen shots taken. I did this to my dad when I suspected porn...worked like a charm

 

[1337dingo]

Until they get into hardcore porn? Thats how it starts, just boobies...not sayin everyone, but its still where it starts.

Parental Control works like a charm. You either see just what sites they visit or even have screen shots taken. I did this to my dad when I suspected porn...worked like a charm

wait you suspected your dad was on porn so you put parental control .. on your parant?

 

[wag 42]

If your kids are young, say, under 13, then it's fine to spy on them. BUT, you should also spend time educating your kids on the dangers of the internet and if you wouldn't mind, also teaching them about internet etiquettes, such as "dnt tlk lyk a no0b". There's a whole generation of kids coming through who take the internet for granted and simply have no respect.

If they're over 13, and/or the computers are their own computers, then just let them do what they want. Does it really hurt them if they see boobies on the internet? If you're worried about them getting a virus or something from a dodgy porn website, teach them how to find the good ones.

All I can say is just wait until you are a parent and see how fast your tune changes.

 

[gamblingman]

My opinion is to, say filter it, monitor it, and ALSO talk to them about how to use the internet safely. I see people asking about monitoring software, but not on how to talk to the kids about how to cruise the net.

A talk, age appropriate for what you say and how long you talk, including talking about the dangers of malware, viruses, illegal activities, scams and etc... and how to be careful with email (forwards, attachments, personal info, etc...), or with sites like facebook, myspace, twitter, craigslist, etc... about how to be cautious about never revealing personal information such as age, exact location, full name, not friend-ing unknown individuals, and so forth.

Also the porn/illegal downloads talk. Why it's not good to visit those sites for mental well being, legal correctness, and general computer safety.

If you want to use a program to limit sites, and report where the users of the computer are going, It is up to you whether to say that the software is on there. If you do find that they are surfing dangerously then you can deal with it (but remember that kids are curious and eventually you will see them doing something they shouldn't. Be prepared for this event calmly.) Regardless, I would lay down rules beforehand about what is acceptable and not acceptable, then enforce the rules if necessary. They may not like it, but in truth kids PREFER to have definite rules.

And in truth, I have a site blocker that came with the Trend Micro Anti-Virus program and I use it to block all kinds of sites like illegal, porn, hate, malicious, suspicious for infection, and a few other categories. I prefer to block categories I believe to be dangerous for my computer. I do this so that I have a lower chance of accidentally clicking into malware/viruses!

Most of all, make sure to set a strong example through your own actions. And if they have a question or even a dispute about the rules, talk to them instead of just saying (as many parents do) "Because I said so!". Remember parenting isn't just about boxing kids up for "safety", but instead its about showing them/teaching them how to be informed, confident, self aware. Because someday they may be parents, and teaching their kids in much the same way they were taught. Makes ya think huh!

 

[1337dingo]

My opinion is to, say filter it, monitor it, and ALSO talk to them about how to use the internet safely. I see people asking about monitoring software, but not on how to talk to the kids about how to cruise the net.

A talk, age appropriate for what you say and how long you talk, including talking about the dangers of malware, viruses, illegal activities, scams and etc... and how to be careful with email (forwards, attachments, personal info, etc...), or with sites like facebook, myspace, twitter, craigslist, etc... about how to be cautious about never revealing personal information such as age, exact location, full name, not friend-ing unknown individuals, and so forth.

Also the porn/illegal downloads talk. Why it's not good to visit those sites for mental well being, legal correctness, and general computer safety.

If you want to use a program to limit sites, and report where the users of the computer are going, It is up to you whether to say that the software is on there. If you do find that they are surfing dangerously then you can deal with it (but remember that kids are curious and eventually you will see them doing something they shouldn't. Be prepared for this event calmly.) Regardless, I would lay down rules beforehand about what is acceptable and not acceptable, then enforce the rules if necessary. They may not like it, but in truth kids PREFER to have definite rules.

And in truth, I have a site blocker that came with the Trend Micro Anti-Virus program and I use it to block all kinds of sites like illegal, porn, hate, malicious, suspicious for infection, and a few other categories. I prefer to block categories I believe to be dangerous for my computer. I do this so that I have a lower chance of accidentally clicking into malware/viruses!

Most of all, make sure to set a strong example through your own actions. And if they have a question or even a dispute about the rules, talk to them instead of just saying (as many parents do) "Because I said so!". Remember parenting isn't just about boxing kids up for "safety", but instead its about showing them/teaching them how to be informed, confident, self aware. Because someday they may be parents, and teaching their kids in much the same way they were taught. Makes ya think huh!

AGREED... ( :good: 1337dingo likes this )

 

[wag 42]

gamblingman, you hit the nail right on the head!

 

[Dystopia]

wait you suspected your dad was on porn so you put parental control .. on your parant?

heheheh, yep. He still doesn't know. Wait. My mom might have told him, cause I showed her the screen shots.

Anyway, Parental Control is a GREAT program to track what they do, and block it. However since the company stopped producing and supporting it, you have to downloaded it else where (such as Cnet.com). Here is a link for you:

http://download.cnet.com/Crawler-Parental-Control/3000-2162_4-10666247.html

 

[tremmor]

i agree also. having grand kids. Heap of trouble pronto with something like google and right now, too late. Core porn can be hit easily. not to mention the infections.

 

[codeman0013]

Do you have a router? I just recently went to my aunt's house and turned on a router with a built in firewall and disabled all porn and sexually explicit sites and also showed her how to limit hours of access and turn sites on and off if necessary for punishment.